Attachment
Psychological clinging to experiences, outcomes, people, or things that causes suffering when they change or are lost.
Also known as: Clinging, Upādāna, Grasping, Psychological attachment
Category: Psychology & Mental Models
Tags: buddhism, psychology, mindfulness, well-being, suffering
Explanation
Attachment (upādāna in Buddhist terminology) refers to the psychological clinging to experiences, outcomes, possessions, relationships, or identities. While often confused with love or preference, attachment specifically means the grasping that causes suffering when the object of attachment changes or is lost.
**The Buddha taught that attachment is a root cause of suffering:** 'The root of suffering is attachment.' We suffer not because things change, but because we cling to them and resist their changing.
**Types of attachment:**
- **Sensual attachment**: Clinging to pleasant experiences and aversion to unpleasant ones
- **Attachment to views**: Rigid identification with beliefs and opinions
- **Attachment to identity**: Grasping at self-image, roles, and status
- **Attachment to outcomes**: Needing specific results to feel okay
- **Attachment to relationships**: Possessiveness rather than love
- **Attachment to possessions**: Deriving identity from what we own
**How attachment causes suffering:**
- Fear of loss creates anxiety
- Resistance to change creates frustration
- Unmet expectations cause disappointment
- Comparison to others breeds envy
- Identity threats trigger defensiveness
**Signs of unhealthy attachment:**
- Inability to accept change or loss
- Excessive worry about future outcomes
- Strong negative reactions when expectations aren't met
- Defining self-worth by external factors
- Inability to let go of past grievances
**The antidote isn't detachment** (not caring) but **non-attachment**: engaging fully while holding lightly, loving without possessing, working hard without being devastated by failure.
For knowledge workers, recognizing attachment helps: identify why certain failures hurt so much, reduce anxiety about outcomes, make clearer decisions free from fear, and maintain mental health through change.
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